


His Name Is Peter

by cazei



Series: mcu by cazei [1]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017)
Genre: Body Dysphoria, Coming Out, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gender Dysphoria, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Peter Parker Needs a Hug, Peter is a Little Shit, Peter needs to take off his binder, Peter-centric, Self-Harm, Society is a bitch, Tony Being Tony, Tony Stark Has A Heart, Trans Character, Trans Male Character, Trans Peter Parker
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-08-08
Updated: 2018-08-08
Packaged: 2018-12-12 20:38:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 5,876
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11744751
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cazei/pseuds/cazei
Summary: A Peter-centric chaptered fic that focuses on him being a trans-male hero in New York, and how he comes out to the Avengers.-"When he was five, Peter was a scrappy little boy with jagged hair and a gleaming smile; he was ready to take on the world."-CW: There will be unhealthy coping mechanisms to dysphoria such as wearing a binder for a prolonged amount of time and implied and/or referenced self-harm.Please be warned and stay safe.





	1. Exposition

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> enjoy~~ there will be more if it's received well!!!

Peter Parker is a prisoner to his own skin.

 

This may sound dramatic or untrue, but let me use words as evidence.

 

When he was still in his mother’s womb, the words rang through the hospital room: “ _it’s a girl!_ ”

 

When he was one year old, the only clothing he owned was pink. This wouldn’t be an issue -- pink is just a color, after all -- but people didn’t understand the weight it put on people. On _children_.

And this weight is not _weight_ in the physical sense of mass. It's psychological. Growing up in a suffocating world where people tell you to be one thing when you are another is the hardest thing someone can do. 

When he was two, he saw his parents for the last time, though he doesn’t remember it. The words resounded, “ _I’ll miss you, baby girl_.”

 

When he was four, he’d rather ignore when people called him _Payton_ thinking that it was, frankly, an embarrassing name and he’d rather have a cooler one. Something more gender neutral Like, Peyton or Perry.

 

Or Peter.

 

When he was five, he told his aunt and uncle this. When he was five, he started going by Peter and he/him pronouns.

 

When he was five, Peter was a scrappy little boy with jagged hair and a gleaming smile; he was ready to take on the world.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm not ftm trans but im agender so i dont Get it but i Get It? so i like to think of myself as informed, but by all means if I get something wrong feel free to correct me.


	2. Chapter One

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peter Parker is a grieving, hormonal mess of a teenager with the added weight of being transgender and Spider-Man to top it off.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> enjoy!!!!

Peter stares at himself in the mirror and adjusts his shirt over his well-worn binder. 

 

He is fifteen, a sophomore, and he is so thankful that his Aunt May allowed him to start taking Testosterone when he was fourteen. 

 

It’s been months since his last period, and he can nearly cry from relief. 

 

He knows,  _ he knows _ , that periods aren’t gendered things. Most people with vaginas have them, and he knows better than most people that sex isn’t equivalent to gender. He  _ knows _ it doesn’t invalidate his identity. 

 

Dysphoria is a  _ bitch _ , though. 

 

It’s been nine months since his last period, and he still gets queasy and dysphoric thinking about going through it again. People who get their cycle are tough as balls. 

 

Shaking his head to keep himself focused, Peter grabs his backpack from his bed and heads into the kitchen. 

 

The kitchen is dark and empty; Peter wishes he could be surprised. It’s been a month since Aunt May was awake early enough to see him off to school. It is simply an apartment now, no longer a home, the life of their apartment has been gone for a month. 

 

Uncle Ben died a month ago, too.

 

Peter Parker is a grieving, hormonal mess of a teenager with the added weight of being transgender  _ and  _ Spider-Man to top it off. 

 

Oh, right. A month and a half ago, he was bit by a spider, developed a bunch of crazy powers, and he started to fight neighborhood crime  _ blah, blah, blah _ . More importantly, he is  _ hungry as fuck _ . 

 

The fridge is empty, typical, and so are the pantries. Well, not completely empty, he supposed. He could always drink spoiled milk with his bruised, rotting apple and past-expiration-date pastry. 

 

Peter glances at his phone to check the time,  _ 6:49 A.M., _ and he’s greeted with an alarming amount of text messages from today and last night.

 

_ (1:48 A.M.) Aunt May: Peter, where are you?  _

_ (2:29 A.M.) Aunt May: We’re having a talk tomorrow. You can’t keep missing curfew.  _

 

_ (1:52 A.M.) Ned: Hey ur aunt is freaking out bc ur out late so u sld call her and go home _

_ (2:19 A.M.) Ned: R u okay man _

 

The rest are all from Ned, ranging from concerned, to angry, to excited about a new Lego set that he’s planning on saving up for. Peter rolls his eyes and pockets his cell phone. 

 

School starts at 7:30 A.M.; he has time to get breakfast from a shop before catching a train. 

 

Or, you know, he could always web-sling to school and then change in the back alley next to the garbage dump. 

 

“That sounds like a plan,” Peter mutters to himself, calls out a goodbye into the hollow apartment, and heads into the world that has done him so much harm. 

 

His meal is a small, cheap breakfast burrito that he got off a sketchy-looking cart, which sits near the edge of his block. It isn’t much, but it isn’t nothing, and he’s learned to live with that. 

 

See, after Ben died a month ago, Peter is finally starting to understand grief. He is trying to put it behind him, but the wound is still so, so fresh that he can feel the blood grace his fingertips. Instead of acceptance or denial of it, though, he roams the streets at night in a hoodie and jeans, distracting himself by pretending to be the hero Ben thinks he is. 

 

Thought. The hero Ben  _ thought  _ he  _ was _ . He’s still getting used to changing tenses as well as conversation topics. 

 

It’s not the best coping mechanism, but if the scars on his arms and legs that are  _ just  _ too thin and well placed to be accidental  _ as well as _ the faded bruises on his ribs from wearing a binder too long… Well, Peter isn’t the best at coping mechanisms.

 

The noise of the city drowns out his thoughts, and he makes his way to school in the best way he can imagine: flying high above it all. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _please_ comment if you enjoyed it!!!!!!!!!!
> 
> **Hi, recently I've been getting a few messages that were hateful to the LGBT+ community and everything that goes along with it. If you do not respect my, or any of these identities, please do not bother writing a comment because it will be immediately deleted. If you want to have an actual conversation about it, my tumblr is listed below.**
> 
>  
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> 
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>  
> 
> Shoot me a message on Tumblr: @CalciumSulfide
> 
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> **Don't forget to comment!**


	3. Chapter Two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> enjoy

Peter is getting tired of Flash. Has been, since the day they met. See, because Flash, against all odds, knew that Peter was trans. And he doesn’t let him or anyone else forget it. 

 

Until Highschool, just Ned knew. Ned, his friend from Eighth Grade, surprisingly isn’t bothered by it. Apparently his Uncle Roger user to go by Aunt Samantha, and one of his cousins is now Brooke instead of Bryan. In face, Ned seems to know a lot more about what it  _ means  _ to be trans than most cisgendered people. 

 

And then Flash comes along and ruins Peter’s state of grace. The taunts are endless, as are the transphobic insults tossed his way. 

 

Then, of course, he became Spider-Man and everything that came with that happened, including Ben dying, but being that neighborhood hero was still a safe haven to Peter. Flying high in the sky, swinging from webs of his own creation… Well, anything felt possible. 

 

When the gun of a mugger is pressed to his chest, and he manages to save himself by shooting the criminal in the face with a web, Peter  _ knows  _ anything is possible. 

 

Then he goes to school the next day, tired and sore, and has to deal with Flash calling him “Miss” and “Tranny”.  Mostly, everyone else avoids those slurs  _ or  _ Peter, which is fine with him. 

 

The only one who steps up for him is Ned, and sometimes a few people from his decathlon team, but other than that he is alone. 

 

Then Tony Stark shows up in his house, tells him that Peter is needed in  _ Germany  _ of all places. Peter gets an  _ actual  _ suit, steals Captain America’s shield, and is basically badass in general. 

 

He gets the feeling that none of them even  _ know  _ he’s transgender, which is… Well, amazing. He’s passing. Peter Parker is a passing transboy to  _ Tony Fucking Stark and Steve Rodgers.  _

 

Then, Happy ignores him until he nearly dies a couple times, Peter’s suit is taken away, but then he gets it back. Oh, he also crashed a helicopter. Yeah, that happened.  _ It was awesome _ .

 

Could his life  _ get  _ any better?

 

Well, the answer is  _ no, it can’t _ . 

 

Peter checks his phone once more, in the middle of World History.

 

-

_ No unread messages _

-

 

This used to be a bad thing. Happy would ignore and ignore him as Peter made a fool of himself trying to get ahold of him. As an orphan who seems to lose all those he grows close to, Peter was scared that Tony and Happy would end up the same way. And Peter knows one way to distract himself. 

 

Peter finds himself mindlessly rubbing his arm through his sleeve as Flash maturely rolls another wad of paper. 

 

Peter can hear it as it’s thrown, and he would avoid it. But, he can’t. He can’t reveal his senses, so he has to sit still and take the hit. The paper hits the back of his head with a  _ thwack  _ and Flash snorts. 

 

Ned whips around in his seat and glares at Flash and his friends. 

 

“What?” Flash mouths. “Gonna cry?”

 

Peter rolls his eyes and shakes his head at Ned; he doesn’t need to get involved. 

 

“Drop it,” Peter mutters. “It’s nothing.”

 

Ned shrugs but turns back in his seat. 

 

Flash doesn’t give up, and he starts to insult Peter once more, “Go cry to Tony Stark --  _ oh, wait, the internship is fake _ , isn’t it?”

 

Peter doesn’t answer and instead pulls out his StarkPhone. 

-

_ Peter Parker to Happy Hogan: _

 

_ r we doing suit mods this wknd? _

_ English, please.  _ __  
  


_ are we doing suit checkup&modifications this weekend? _

 

_ That’s better; and, yes, I’m already waiting outside with a car. Do hurry. _

-

Peter glares at the clock, willing it to go faster. Five more minutes until school ends and he can go spend the weekend upstate at the new compound. It’s only a few hours from the city, but Peter can’t go everyday. Instead, Tony sends a car for him about once a month, and he spends a few days in the labs fixing his suit. 

 

Ned leans over. “Want to work on Chemistry homework this weekend?”

 

“Sorry, Ned,” Peter grins. “I’m going upstate.”

 

MJ sighs. “Why?”

 

Peter had nearly forgotten that she was there.

 

Peter gives her a look. “You know why. You figured it out weeks ago,” He whispers.

 

She rolls her eyes. “I figured it out ages ago, Webby.  Why are you going upstate?”

 

“Avenger’s Compound,” Peter whispers. MJ, being MJ, doesn’t even raise her eyebrow in shock. 

 

“Don’t die,” She says tonelessly and goes back to her book. 

 

After what feels like several years have passed, Mrs. Rael dismisses them for the day, just as the bells echo off the walls, and Peter runs from his seat towards the door. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **may want 2 read this**
> 
>  
> 
> hello it is i, the author who doesn't know where tf this is going. idk what this chapter was. i wanted to skip all the canon events to get to where i can manipulate it more for the sake of trans-peter and coming out to tony & all that jaz. if you don'y like the time skip, and want a more detailed explination lemme know in teh comments. 
> 
> next chapter: probably trans/dysphoria angst. a weekend at the tower w/ the newly reunited avengers. possible coming out?


	4. Chapter Three

Peter emerges from the sea of students, squinting into the sun until he spots Happy.

A grin appears on his face as he sees Happy Hogan waiting on his phone in the front seat. Happy doesn’t spot him, but he grins all the same. 

Just as his right foot swings in front of the left -- a minor yet necessary movement needed to walk distances -- a hand pushing at the back of his bag threatens to send him toppling down the stairs.

As Peter thinks,  _ can Flash get any more cliche? _ he does. 

 

Flash Thompson rolls his eyes at Peter’s flustered appearance. 

 

“Going somewhere, Penis Parker?”

 

Peter returns the eye roll. “That got old the first time you said it, Flash.”

 

Flash laughs. “And yet it still reminds you of what you don’t have.”

 

A sad yet truthful statement. 

 

Ned, timing as  _ amazing  _ as always, speaks up from Peter’s side. “Don’t you have other places to be gross and transphobic at?”

 

MJ snickers, and Peter is wondering if he isn’t the only one with powers in his friend group because  _ when the hell did they get here? _

 

Flash sighs and steps back. “Just tell Black Widow hello for me.”

 

“Well,” Peter says, cocking his head. “It’ll be closer than you’ll ever get to a conversation with a woman. I might as well help your hopeless cause.”

 

Those hands threatening to push him down the stairs earlier? Well, threat delivered.    
  


Ned and MJ don’t react fast enough, and Peter  _ knows  _ he can’t use his reflexes. He sees Flash move to shove him what feels like hours before he makes contact, but he can’t react. He can’t let anyone think he’s anything more than a nerd from Queens. 

 

If anyone did find out, they’d connect him to May, and MJ, and Ned. He  _ cannot  _ let that happen. Even if he didn’t suffer for his identity, his family would.

 

So,  _ yeah _ , Peter takes the hit. 

 

For a brief moment, Peter is in glorious freefall that reminds him of building hopping and the wind rushing past his face moments before he uses a web to pull him back to the skyline. 

 

Then, his chin hits the cement stair, and he remembers that he isn’t Spider-Man right now. He’s just Peter Parker. 

 

The weight of his backpack is thrown over him, and he reaches the bottom of the stairwell in a not-so-graceful heap. 

 

“Peter!” Ned calls. 

 

MJ adds, “You okay, dork?”

 

They know he’s okay. He’s been shot. He’s had buildings fall on him. This isn’t anything. 

 

He groans and pulls himself back to his feet as Flash  _ chuckles  _ \-- honest to God chuckles -- and walks away. The footsteps of MJ and Ned, as well as a few others, walk to him as he ungracefully adjusts himself. 

 

“God,” Ned says, “your chin.”

 

As Peter’s fingers grace his chin he realized that, yeah, it’s totally bleeding everywhere. And so is his right elbow and knee. In front of the whole school. And Happy. 

 

_ And Happy. Shit.  _

 

Peter whirls around to see the man himself staring out of the car window, as if he saw the whole scene. He’s glaring at Peter, the teen realizes. 

 

“I need to go,” Peter says. “That’s Happy.”

 

MJ turns and waves at the man, smiling her smile she wears at protests. Suddenly, as Happy notices her, the waving hand flips him off. 

 

“What?” MJ says, noting Ned and Peter’s displeasure at the crude gesture. “He’s glaring. He works for a billionaire who used to sell weapons. He proba--”

 

“MJ,” Peter hisses. “Knock it off. Just -- I’ll heal in a bit. I need to go now.”

 

Ned nods. “Text us. Or call. I want to know what the compounds like.”

 

“I’ve already told you what it’s like, Ned,” Peter says. His man in the chair rolls his eyes. 

 

“What if some of the Rogue Avengers are there?” Ned says, fascinated.

 

Peter groans. “Let’s not get into politics.”

 

MJ shrugs. “Technically, both sides were flawed. Total government control isn’t good, but neither is total freedom of these kinds of powers.”

 

“And I agree,” Peter says, “but I didn’t know what the fight was about until after Germany.”

 

The loud horn of Happy’s car interrupts the conversation, and Peter jumps again. 

 

As he’s walking to the car, Peter calls to his friends, “Bye, I’ll text you, I need to go!”

 

“Nerd,” MJ mutters and goes back to her book.

 

“You’re reading a book on astrophysics right now,” Ned says pointedly. 

 

“Nerd.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> aka the most cliche trope in this fandom i've used
> 
> \--
> 
> ok this was gonna be part of the compound n coming out too but this felt liek a good place 2 stop and post @ so here you go
> 
> next chapter v v v soon!!


	5. Chapter Four

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> peter arrives at the compound

As soon as Peter sits in the car, Happy pulls out of the parking lot. Not many people drive home from school, so there’s relatively no traffic until they reach the street.

“Hey, Happy,” Peter says, breaking the silence that’s fallen over them.

Happy doesn’t respond; no one does until they pull out of the highschool parking lot.

“You want to tell me what that was about?” Happy says calmly, but his tone is not what his name would suggest.

Peter feels his heart rate pick up, and he finds himself wiping his chin.

“What _what_ was about, Mr. Hogan?”

Happy rolls his eyes, keeping them fixated on the road. “You know what I mean. That kid. Is he always picking on you. And cut the Mr. Hogan shit. It’s Happy, okay, Kid?”

Peter sighs. “He’s just a dick. No, I don’t usually get pushed down stairs. My chin will scab in a few minutes, and my elbow and knee are already bruising: I’m fine. Can we drop it?”

“You are so lucky Tony isn’t here.”

Peter jolts from the back seat. “Why? Am I in trouble? Is this about the hot dog I took last week -- look, I went back and paid for it. I was just so hungry, and I haven’t been sleeping well since the Toomes thing, and--”

Happy interrupts. “And the kid is back, and more talkative than ever. Look, Parker, I don’t know what hot dog you’re talking about, and frankly I don’t care. The bit about not sleeping or eating since Toomes is going to be passed along to my superiors, mind you--”

“No, Happy! I’m good I swear! Don’t bother Mr. Stark about it!”

“-- It’s _Tony_ , and he deserves to know what’s bothering you,” Happy continues. “And I want to know about this bully of yours.”

Peter elects to ask a question of his own rather than answering Happy’s. “Why does Mr. S- Tony have to know? It’s not as if it’s affecting my grades or anything. Ever since May found out -- and chewed out Tony; did you hear? It was kinda funny -- I haven’t been as focused. It’s just hard when someone is so worried you’re going to get hurt, you start to think you are. And the Toomes thing is nothing, Happy, really.”

“You completely avoided that boy in that entire ramble of yours,” Happy says. “Tony understands the PTSD part of the hero-business more than I do; he’s your best bet to talk to if you don’t want a therapist, though that couldn’t hurt. He cares, Peter. And so does May, and you’re friends back there. What I’m concerned about right now if you’re bloody chin and you’re not-friend back there.”

“Not-friend,” Peter laughs. “Eloquent, Happy.”

When Happy doesn’t laugh or crack a smile, Peter starts to ramble again.

“He just likes to bother me about - stuff. It’s not a big deal, Happy. He’s just a jerk. He’s never tried to touch me before; this is the first time. It won’t happen again.”

“What does he bother you about?” Happy says, seemingly catching his slip in words.

 _Hi_ , Peter imagines himself saying. _My name is Peter, I’m fifteen, and I’m transgender._

Because, no, he’s not actually out to anyone in this part of his life. He’s shocked that Tony hasn’t stumbled upon it, or Karen, FRIDAY, or any AI of the sort.

He binds. He wears a packer. He’s on T. Frankly, they have no reason to suspect. The only times he’s been hurt, he’s kept his clothes on around Tony and Happy. He knows that this is in his medical file, but apparently Tony hasn’t gone that far into it.

Peter doesn’t think they would mind. He just can’t risk it.

“Grades,” Peter says instead. “I’m always a point ahead of Flash, and he hates it.”

“The kid’s name is Flash? Boy, Stark’s going to have a field day with this.”

Peter’s eyes widen. “You _cannot_ tell Mr. Stark.”

Happy sighs and glances at Peter from the rearview mirror. “He’d want to know.”

Peter shakes his head. “If...If he’s going to find out, let me tell him.”

Peter’s unspoken _there’s a few things I have to say first_ die on his tongue.

\--

The rest of the trip to upstate is quiet, and the songs from the radio fill the car. Peter ends up donning earbuds to finish editing a lab report for his Chemistry class, and before he knows it they’ve reached the secluded compound.

Several figures are sparring on an open training field, and Peter presses his face to the window.

“Don’t you have a training room inside?” Peter asks.

Happy scoffs. “Several. Cap likes the outdoors better.”

Peter’s jaw drops. “Captain America? He’s here?”

Happy nods. “Long story short, Rhodey, Tony, and Steve are negotiating the new accords. It’ll feature opinions from both sides. Right now, they’re trying to learn how to work together as a team again.”

Happy pulls into a parking garage that opens when he shines a badge at a sensor.

“But, aren’t they outlaws? Like, I mean, I know both sides had their flaws and all, but the Accords were with the government and they broke them. How can they be here?”

“This isn’t the government,” Happy says. “You’ll be getting a SHIELD briefing later. I’m sure you know all about them, due to Natasha’s information leak a while back.”

Peter nods avidly. “So, are, like, all the Avenger’s here?”

Happy nods. “Tony, Sam, Steve, James, other James, Natasha, Clint, Vision, Wanda, Bruce. I think Thor might even be here -- you get the point; everyone’s here. Including you.”

“Wait,” Peter says. “ _Bucky_ is here? Tony said he was in some kind of Cryostasis Chamber?”

Happy nods. “Yep. Tony knows a guy, Stephen Strange. Neuroscientist and apparently magician? I don’t know. Anyhow, he brought Bucky back as best he could.”

“That’s insane.”

“Just wait, kid.”

\--

Two minutes later brings Peter to the lobby of the compound, waiting for Tony to come meet him. Happy wondered off, warning him not to get into trouble, so Peter just stayed put and asked FRIDAY to call for Mr. Stark.

Just as he’s going through his backpack, seeing what he has to do for the weekend, the metallic noise of opening elevator doors rings in his ear and he turns to see Tony Stark staring at him.

“What happened to your face?” Tony asks without preamble.

Happy’s voice floats in from god-knows-where, “Kid tripped on the sidewalk. Real kultz, you have here.”

Tony rolls his eyes. “Let’s see if Bruce has any instant-freeze ice packs. We’ve been working on them. As soon as you touch it, it’ll freeze. When you let go, it’ll go dormant again.”

Peter frowns. “Can’t I just use normal ice?”

Tony claps Peter on the back. “Where’s the fun in that?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yo so yes i know this story has been moving fast  
> usually i have a plot in mind and don't write this quick but i don't really  
> so i mean sorry about that  
> it'll be pretty linear from now on !!
> 
> anyhow, how'd you enjoy the chapter? longest one yet, i think


	6. Chapter Five

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After that rather odd introduction, the name clicks in Peter’s head. “You’re Hawkeye. Oh, my god! You’re an Avenger!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> holy shit im alive

Peter sits on a counter of one of the many common areas of Avengers Tower. A purple ice pack _thing_ is pressed against his arm.

 

Tony had left, moments earlier, to get find Bruce and ask a few questions about some long-worded science-thing. Peter pulls out his phone instead of worrying about the man.

 

Considering Tony actually worded it as _a long-worded science-thing,_ he thinks there’s nothing more he can do. Anthony is _long_ gone.

 

* * *

 **_Chat: ned is a dork_ ** **_  
_ ** _MJ: Hey, Pete, how are the Avengers?_ _  
_ _Peter: shhh no1 is suppsd 2 no_ _  
_ _MJ: ..._ _  
_ _MJ: Fine._ _  
_ _MJ: Hey, Pete, how's the internship?_ _  
_ _Peter: is good_ _  
_ _Ned: dEETS_ _  
_ _MJ: ^^_ _  
_ _Peter: we r all gonna train in abt an hour so i mean_ _  
_ _MJ: Wow._ _  
_ _Ned: whAT_ _  
_ _Ned: WHAT WITH ALL OF THEM PARKER WHAT_ _  
_ _MJ: Don't die._ _  
_ _Ned: OMGOMGOMG_ _  
_ _  
_ _Peter left the chat_ _  
_ _  
_ _  
_ **_Private Message: Peter, Ned_ ** **_  
_ ** _Ned: so_ _  
_ _Peter: o no_ _  
_ _Ned: about training,,,_ _  
_ _Peter: yes?_ _  
_ _Ned: if you wear your binder, ill kill you_ _  
_ _Peter:_   
Peter: duly noted bye

* * *

  
Tony hasn’t returned and told him they were going to start, but he really doesn’t want to tell Ned that he _has_ to wear his binder.

 

His dysphoria wasn’t _as_ bad as it could be. That being said, it wasn’t good, but it definitely gets worse.

 

However, he really can wear _nothing_ in the Spider-suit, and he’s pretty sure that’s what he’ll be training in. Tony took it as soon as he arrived, said he was going to see if any adjustments needed to be made before he get the shit kicked out of him.

 

Peter added that last part. It’s pessimistic, but these are Avengers. Avengers who don’t know he’s fifteen, who he doesn’t want to know he’s fifteen, who he thinks will treat him like a child if they know he’s fifteen… But Tony said they’re going to introduce him to the once-great team, and he doesn’t think Tony means his alter ego with a black arachnid on his chest.

 

Maybe he can make Natasha like him… They’re both spiders, after all. He’s only met Tony, Bruce (who was at the Tower in Midtown once, and he _totally_ geeked out _)_ and Happy. He’s been on a phone call with Rhody once, though.

* * *

_The thin, sleek phone on the lab table was ringing._

 

_Peter is alone is a highly secretive lab, Tony having left to get a piece of equipment from another lab, and Tony’s phone is ringing._

 

_He creeps over to it, already regretting his life choices that led up to this moment. On the screen, it reads: Col. Rhodes_

 

 _Oh_ shit.

 

_“F.R.I.D.A.Y,” He asks the ceiling who hums in return. “Should I answer it? Will Mr. Stark be mad?”_

 

_“Go right ahead, Peter. I’m sure Sir will understand your dilemma.”_

 

_Peter snatches the phone off the counter. Swiping to answer, he holds the phone at his ear._

 

_“Finally, Tony,” A relieved voice says. “I thought you were going to let it ring. Anyhow, what’s the plans for this weekend? Pepper says you’re going to the Gala, and she’s sent me to make sure you show.”_

 

_“Uh,” Peter starts. “Mr. Stark isn’t here right now.”_

 

_The other end goes silent._

 

_“Who is this?” James doesn’t sound angry or mad, just confused. “Wait, is Tony okay?”_

 

_Okay, okay, Peter, be cool._

 

_“My-My name is Peter. Peter Parker,” Goddamnit, “I'm an intern. Yeah. Intern.”_

 

_James sighs. “An intern with access to Tony’s phone? You know, it’s coded to only allow a few people to even open it. So, that brings me to my next point. Who is this really?”_

 

_Peter exhales. “Peter. My name is Peter. I’m— well, I’m Spider-Man.”_

 

_“Nice try. You sound like you’re twelve. Go on, who is this that Start granted permission for his sacred phone?”_

 

_Peter doesn’t argue, all he says is: “I’m fifteen.”_

 

_James is silent._

 

 _“Holy_ shit _, you’re telling the truth,” He says after nearly twenty terrible seconds of silence._

 

_The door opens, and Peter jumps from the phone, letting it clatter to the table, as if he was just caught with his hand in a cookie jar._

 

_“Were you on my phone?” Tony says, raising an eyebrow._

 

 _“_ Anthony Edward Stark _,” A small voice says, muffled by the table. It’s not even on speaker, that’s just how loud Rhodey is. “You brought a child to Berlin.”_

 

_Tony just looks a Peter, not mad. Not disappointed. Just really, really annoyed._

* * *

Just as he’s thinking this, a noise rattled his ears. It was metallic sounding, like if you were to drop a coin on a sheet of metal.

 

His senses go wild, and he can narrow down that that noise, whatever it was, was _definitely_ coming from the vents.

 

Except, looking at the plain ceiling, there were no vent openings to be seen.

 

The room is so silent, he feels that he needs to hold his breath or some kind of balance will be broken.

 

However, apparently this is just a feeling that only he has, because a hidden panel in the ceiling opens, and a man falls from it.

 

There are several things to note:

 

One: This ceiling _was_ smooth. There were no seals or anything for this panel to open from. One second it was a ceiling, and the next a hole. Peter needs the architect's number.

 

Two: Peter is still sitting on the counter with an ice pack pressed against his arm. He’s sitting on a counter that probably cost more than his apartment wearing a _Star Wars_ long-sleeve and old jeans.

 

Three: The man doesn’t _fall_ per say. He lands. Every movement, every moment, is calculated and executed with extreme precision.

 

“Oh,” The man says as soon as he lands on his feet. There’s a click and the panel above closes to hide the vents once more. “Hello, small child.”

 

Peter doesn’t move.

 

“Like that didn’t you?” The man says, referencing his entrance. “Learned _that shit_ from the circus. You must be Stark’s kid, the one Nat talked about.”

 

Peter blinks. “Uh - hello.”

 

For once, he’s at a loss for words.

 

“Clinton Barton, at your service,” The man announces. And immediately trips over his own feet trying to walk into the kitchen.

* * *

 

After _that_ rather odd introduction, the name clicks in Peter’s head. “You’re Hawkeye. Oh, my god! You’re an Avenger!”

 

Clint rolls his eyes and continues walking towards the fridge. Peter shifts excitedly, following Clint with his eyes.

 

“I’m supposed to meet you later!”

 

“Nat just said that Tony — acquired? stole? I don’t know — got a kid. You an intern, or something?”

 

“My name is Peter,” Peter says. “And, I mean, my dad is dead, so he’s definitely not Mr. Stark.”

 

Wow. _Smooth_.

 

He can practically hear MJ cackling.

 

“Shame, kid,” Clint says. “So, Peter, let’s just say I’m curious. _Why_ am I supposed to meet you later?”

 

Caution being throw into the wind? It’s more likely than you’d think.

 

“I’m,” Peter starts to say. It feels taboo, like he’s not _allowed_ to say it or a switch will be triggered and everything will fall apart. But, Clint’s an Avenger. And he seems, well, interesting.

 

But this is Tony’s friend. Or, he was. And he’s trying to be again, and Tony is trying to reclaim these relationships as well. He needs to trust these people. They’re some of the only people on the planet who can understand half of what he goes through on a regular Tuesday.

 

“Spider-Man,” Peter admits. “Hello.”

 

Clint drops his knife, causing peanut butter to fall on the floor.

 

“You’re wearing a _Star War_ shirt.”

 

“Yes.”

 

“And, you’re, like, fourteen.”

 

“Fifteen.”

 

“And you’re a vigilante from Queens.”

 

“Yep.”

 

“Well. Welcome to to team. It’s shit.”

 

Peter tilts his head. “Just like that?”

 

Clint laughs. “I have kids. I wouldn’t want them in danger like you put yourself in. But Tony obviously cares enough to bring you here, this weekend in particular. I need to trust Tony’s judgement on this — oh, _hell yes_ someone bought Triscuits.”

 

Peter looks down at his arm to see it healed of all injuries. His chin feels scabbed over as well.

 

And then he opens his mouth and allows the questions to pour out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi!! i stopped posting!! sorrryyyyyyyy
> 
> so like from now on expect spratic updates when my school and mental health learn to cooperate and i have a good day !!!
> 
> idk ill try to post more. sorry abt that!


	7. Chapter Six

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peter meets Natasha and comes out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HEY IM BACK IM SO SORRY 
> 
> u may want to reread the rest of this. bc its... late.

Natasha Romanoff lives up to her scary, intimidating name. She walks up to him, scanning him as if she knows every secret, and nods. 

 

“I’ve been wondering who Stark has been hiding. Nice to finally meet you, Spider-Man.”

 

Peter throws a glance to Clint, who is still shoving his mouth full of Triscuits. Clint shrugs in response; he’s no help then. 

 

“How — how did you know?” Peter asks, subconsciously crossing his arms over his chest and his — well, you know. 

 

She raises an eyebrow, and Peter swallows forcefully. 

 

“That’s not a concern,” Black Widow says smoothly. “I’m glad we have another spider on the team, the birds were staring to outnumber us.”

 

Clint huffs. “Sam and I are still better.”

 

Peter laughs awkwardly. “Uh, thanks, Ms. Black Widow.”

 

She laughs, and it only sounds half forced. “Call me Natasha, please. What’s your name?”

 

“Peter — Peter Parker, ma’am,” Peter says. 

 

Natasha laughs and shakes her head again. “Nice to meet you, Peter. But really, call me Natasha.”

 

Clint nods bravely. “Do what she says, Pete. Do what she says! She’s scary when she doesn’t get her way, trust me. You don’t wanna know what happened in Budapest. There was this fountain, and-“

 

Before he can finish, Natasha grabs the box of crackers and throws them across the kitchen. Clint  _ yelps _ , like he was a dog and someone stepped on his tail. He throws himself off the counter and scrambles across the room, grabs the Triscuits, and runs from the room. 

 

Natasha makes to go across the room and follow him, but Peter says, “Uh. Ms. Natasha Black Widow?”

 

She sighs, but doesn’t bother correcting him. 

 

“Yes, Peter?”

 

“I — Can I talk to you?” He asks before he realizes what he’s saying. His heart drops when he nods. “Okay, so, like, I know you’re a spy and stuff, but you know Mr. Stark, right? And I have something I need to tell him, and I figured since we’re both Spiders, right, that you can help me see if it’s a good idea or not...”

 

She’s silent for a long time. “You talk a lot, spider. But you’re right, I do know Tony. And I also know how much he cares for you, Peter, even if he hasn’t told you how much. Whatever it is, I’m sure you’ll be fine.”

 

Peter sighs. The validation doesn’t quite help; Anxiety doesn’t listen to reason. 

 

“Thanks,” Peter says anyway. “I’m sure it’ll be fine.”

 

She doesn’t look convinced. “Do you want to practice?”

 

Peter nods hesitantly. She’ll be accepting, right? He’s seen her on TV, punching an anti-LGBT+ protester. I’ll be fine... Right?

 

“Okay... Sure. Yeah. Practice,” Peter says. He exhales. “Here goes. Okay. Uh - I’m trans? Transgender?”

 

His voice trails off at the end. Natasha sits back. 

 

“I see,” She says firmly. Peter’s heart drops. “I’m Natasha, she/her pronouns. You?”

 

Peter doesn’t think his heart can handle the roller coaster of emotions. “Peter,” He manages, “He/him. I, uh, transitioned when I was a lot younger. I just think I need to tell Mr. Stark...”

 

Natasha frowns. “Why? You don’t owe anyone an explication, Peter.”

 

“I trust him,” He says. “I just... I think he should know. I’m just scared to see how he’ll react.”

 

She nods. “Well, I’ll tell you right now that The Avengers has more than its fair share of LGBT people. I mean, have you met Steve and Bucky?”

 

Peter’s jaw drops. “No!”

 

She smiles. “Yes. And Wanda? Her and Pietro were identical twins. She’s male-to-female trans; Tony paid for everything. You have nothing to worry about here, Peter.”

 

He digests the information. “Really?”

 

Natasha nods. “I’m sure that Wanda will love to talk to you about it.”

 

He nods. “Thank you, Natasha.”

 

She smiles. “Anytime, Peter.”

 

Before the moment gets too sickly sweet, the elevator door opens and Rhodey wheels out. 

 

He frowns. 

 

“Hello?” He asks, staring right at Peter. 

 

Peter waves, trying to shift his emotions back into neutral territory. “We’ve spoken I’m the child in Berlin!”

 

“Oh!” Rhodes lights up. “Peter! I’ve heard so much about you!”

 

Then he frowns. “Is your arm okay?”

 

Peter looks at the ice pack that he held back to his arm earlier, after setting it down for a brief time. “Yeah, I just tripped. Earlier.”

 

James nods. “I’m glad you’re okay. Does Tony know you’re here?”

 

Peter nods. “He’s in the lab? He had to talk to Bruce about something.”

 

Peter laughs as the elevator opens behind Rhodey. 

 

Natasha smirks and leans against a counter. “Speak of the devil.”

 

Tony feigns hurt feelings. “How dare you, Natasha? I am so much hotter than Lucifer.”

 

“There’s the Pride. I wonder how long until we see Gluttony or Sloth?” Natasha says, but the question is rhetorical. Tony gapes. “See you later, boys. Training is in a half hour.”

 

She leaves as quickly as she appeared. 

 

-

 

The ten minutes that Tony, Rhodey, and Peter talk after her departure are awkward. Peter desperately wants to talk to Tony, to get it over with, but Rhodey is there. 

 

Every second that passes has the anxiety building, slowly outnumbering his confidence. 

 

He looks at Tony, and Tony smiles back at him quickly. Even as Rhodey leaves, to get his suit, Peter can’t bring himself to talk. 

 

Whatever confidence he had around Natasha is gone. 

 

He can’t do this… He can’t risk it all. 

 

This is his life now, and he can’t throw it away. 

 

Besides; Natasha was right. Why would Tony need to know?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> look honestly i am so sorry. i just had no motivation, and ngl and tmi i was pretty down. it was a really rough time, but im getting throuh it, and writing is really helping. i recently started posting to some of my smaller fics, and this was one that helped me a lot. 
> 
> ive decided on a total of nine chapters. this one, a coming out chapter, and an epilog. 
> 
> please stick with me! i am going to finish this! 
> 
> thank you guys so much! comments help more than youd believe, and i love yall!

**Author's Note:**

> Hey! I've got a few transphobic comments! If you do, I'll just delete them. There's no point in toy doing so; save us both the time.  
>  
> 
> Shoot me a message on Tumblr: @Cazei
> 
>    
>  **Don't forget to comment! It really means a lot!**


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